RL Character Sheets

Race: Noodle
Alignment: Neutral Bitch

Class: Loser (10), Student (10), Gardener (5), 


STRENGTH: 6 i struggle with a pot of rice ok
DEXTERITY: 14 I can put my legs behind my head?
CONSTITUTION: 8 or whatever printer paper has
INTELLIGENCE: 16 To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
WISDOM: 14 nevr been in trouble nevr gone cray. 
CHARISMA: 12 *anime smirk*


Fortitude: I can eat p much anything soooo 10
Reflex: 6 on a good day like 3 on a bad
Will: Is there money in my account? 0


SKILLS:
Memes [12]
Spend Money [20]
Water Plants [15]
Binge Research Something [10] 
Get Dolled Up [15]
Have Nowhere To Go [15]
Listen (to people's shit) [20]
Typing [3] that's like how many fingers I use




FEATS:
Lightweight 
Exam Cram 
Extra
Favoured Enemy (People Who Wear Old T-Shirts From Random Team Building Exercises/Old High School/Tourist Destinations)
Millenial
Evasion: Responsibilities
Hardiness vs. Drama
Catch These Hands
Heavy Sleeper
Skill Focus: Growing Toenails
Hangry Rage
Weapon Focus: Microwave - bc it always looks like a bloodbath in there


SPECIAL: When equipping magic item "Smartphone," and scrolling, gain Immunity to Social Interactions

Race: Neanderthal
Alignment: Lawful Good

Class: Viking (19) Machinist (3) Cook (1)


STRENGTH: 18 I have to deal with heavy shite all day But i'm no where near the rigge
DEXTERITY: 8 I'm rather clumsy but not in the drop everything way more of the where is my body way
CONSTITUTION: 20 It took me 18 years to get sick after my last flu.
INTELLIGENCE: 16 I have to deal with extreme precision as well as fixing engineer level fuck ups every day only a sixteen due to the fact as I don't exactly put my mental acuity to anything other than work as well I dislike having to deal with other problems.
WISDOM: 13 I've got a decent head on my shoulders but I'm prone to human mistakes now and then.
CHARISMA: 8 I absolutely hate being around people and it tends to leak out after awhile also not exactly a looker (But that isn't part of charisma to be honest.)


Fortitude: 18 See above constitution
Reflex: -12 See above dexterity
Will: 7 Once again still only human


SKILLS:Electronics [15] Philosophy [3] psychiatry [3] Craft:Cook [13] Machinery [20] Concentration [4] Tumble [-30] Craft:Machine [14] Craft:Boat [14] animal empathy [10] Computer [15] Lore [30] Fun facts [10] Bluff [-2] Vision [-30] Hearing [30]

FEATS:
Heavyweight, Two weapon fighting, Rage, Mighty rage, Blind rage, Terrifying rage, Thundering rage, Waning pacifism, Favored enemy (Humans), Cleave, Great Cleave, unarmed strike, improved unarmed strike, Weapon focus: Improvised weapon, Damage reduction 4/-, ambisinister(Opposite of ambidextrous.),


SPECIAL: While equipping Glasses removes negatives to vision.